Erased.

Last night I immobilized Buffy's shambling corpse.

I was waiting.
Waiting for her arrival.
Waiting.

It was late... or early. Depending on what your stance is.

I heard the bells.  The soft twinkle of foreboding.  The bells I had strapped to the barbed wire wrapped around the rails of the stairs leading up to my apartment. I had carpet on the stairs under it so humans could climb over without harm. Zombies would get snagged.

Zombies did snag.

Two of them.

Charlie and Buffy. Scratching at the air in my direction. Rumors amongst the living is that shamblers have acute memory of their living past. A fresh zombie does unfinished business by reflex.

Even in the dark I could see the deep gashes in Charlie's wrists. The dark ooze that ran down Buffy's front. I could imagine how it all panned out. I pushed Charlie down the stairs so I could deal with Buffy. I gritted my teeth and brought my machete around to decapitate Buffy. Her head just past Charlie on her stumbly crawl back up the stairs. I patiently waited for Charlie to get back up to the barbed wires. I hesitated before I took her head off too. I did three almost hits before I connected. I didn't even know I was crying until I sounded the alarm on the walkie. One by one the apartments checked in.

"Benny. All is safe."
"Jeremy. Missing Buffy."
"Davis. Missing Elliott. "

Elliott. Elliott. Elliott. Elliott. Elliott.

"Use caution but I need you guys here. Code Z. I repeat: Code Z."

I dropped the walkie and ran down the stairs. I collectes the heads and put them safely in the middle of the bodies. Their jaws still moving and gurgling noises escape their mouths.

The guys got to me right as I tossed the heads.

"Davis.... I'm so so sorry." I put my arms up just in time for a scream to be heard from the apartment Charlie was staying in. We watched as Elliott ran over and threw herself at her father's feet. She raised her bloody hands in a begging jester and Davis pulled out his hunting knife and plunged it deep into her eye socket.

We all must have been equally shocked because as he cleaned his knife off he simply said, "She had a bite in her hand. Behead her and toss her into the pool with the rest. Burn them before Lilly sees. As far as she knows these girls ran off. As far was as I'm concerned they left together weeks ago. Sunrise is about an hour. I'd be grateful if they were embers before breakfast." He nodded to us and left somberly.

We did as he said.

No one but me cares that Buffy hasn't been seen. Jeremy started a rumor that she helped the twins leave and probably too ashamed to come back. That she probably feels obligated to help them survive. The bodies we burned were the shamblers that breached the gate as they slipped out. Their pockets were empty.

Erased. Just like that.

Just like that.

Comfort & Gossip

Buffy visits me at night. 

We, uhhh, get acquainted and then she goes back to her apartment that she shares with her group. 

Even though they have been brought into the group officially we aren't sure how everyone will react. Charlie has locked herself in a apartment apart from her parents.  Elliott is often seen breaking in through an unlocked window because Charlie refuses to unlock the door. 

Surprisingly enough Davis doesn't hold a visible grudge towards me about his daughter.  He doesn't even talk about her unless asked. We always ask. Krista is making bets for cigarettes saying that Charlie will kill herself. Elliott assures us that her sister is just in mourning and will be back in the group functioning in no time. Until then I have picked up some of Charlie's chores to show no hard feelings. I even tried to visit her but she just stayed in there, silent.

Kroger is starting a garden. Benny had a small one but Kroger has green thumbs. Both hands. In the short time he's been here he has made the squash flourish and every leaf on every plant seems happier. Kroger even talks with Benny and his kids. He doesn't talk too much to anyone else though. Buffy says he just is picky about who he warms up to but not to take it personally. Kroger doesn't speak to her either but he is kind in his silence, anyway. 

We are pretty sure that Davis and Krista have hooked up too. Even though Krista is my age and Davis is easily in his fifties, she isn't being covert about it. Lilly just ignores it. Amongst Buffy's group they think that Lilly will join as a sister wife with Benny's crew. 

The heat comes and goes, the abundance of rain has kept the shambling idiots at bay. No one has ventured outside the gate in awhile. We have started a paper inventory of what we have in stock so we can plan on a scavenge mission before we get too low on anything. There are enough of us now that we only have one overnight of watch a week on a rotating schedule. We have scheduled voluntary training Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. We rotate who runs it but mainly it's Davis with his military training.

Awhile ago Benny found a rather old metal push mower that doesn't need gas or electricity. I have found a new love for cutting the grass. It's such a workout! My shoulders have gotten brown from the sun. Buffy likes to count my freckles. 

It's so strange that we are becoming so comfortable in our living situation. Even Imogen is allowed out of the apartment and so far her cries have only attracted a few manageable zombies to the gate. We stab them in the eye socket with a rather large knife with little effort. It seems like the only time we get out of the gate is to collect the bodies and burn them in the pool. 

I can almost relax. I get nightmares. We all get nightmares. But I think I can manage. The only thing I take seriously is myself and my safety.... everything else is a wash.

Undead Girlfriend

Yesterday was such a mess.

Buffy wasn't out to sabotage the group but it still sent a ripple out. Soon after I made the entry yesterday there was a knock on the door, the twins.

Elliott and Charlie were both highly upset about my house guest. Their yelling woke Buffy up. I had no words, I didn't know what to say... how to make it right again. Apparently Jeremy was frantically searching for her and was causing everyone else stress.

"I just thought-- Nevermind." Charlie said with tears swelling up. I knew what she thought, and she was right. We had been playing a mental game ever since I got here but we had never physically acted on it. Just random touches here or there, spotting each other during work outs or lingering hugs. I thought it was just the need for companionship, not sexual. I guess I was wrong. "Hey, life is to short for drama, okay? This sucks but I don't want to be on bad terms. I don't want to regret words. We can talk later." Charlie shot Buffy a look, bit her lip and motioned to her sister to leave with her. They closed the front door and I spun around to face Buffy.

"Well, I should get back now. I don't want Jeremy to cause us to get kicked out." Buffy finished getting dressed and left... not even a kiss good bye.

I sat by myself and sipped my coffee. My stomach was in knots. I did a breathing exercise I used before the zombies, my anxiety breathing. My, "Everything works out in the end" and "I can do this." mantra. Having feelings was strange. How calm everyone was even though tension was high was strange. Things are different now.

Another knock at the door.
This should be wonder-fucking-ful.

"Hi. Umm, sorry about earlier. I just--- didn't know how to act. Ya know... about that girl." Charlie stood there, sniffling between words. I couldn't help but be surprised at how upset she was. Even though we flirted it always felt more of a reflex than anything else. Teenage girls flirt and especially flirt with people that would make their Daddy angry... that's all. I thought. "Jasmine, one of the cheerleaders... well... come with me." She grabbed my hand and lead me to the far corner storage unit. My throat was clogged with anxiety, I could barely swallow. I knew what she was going to show me before she pushed open the large door. A hog tied zombie lay in the corner. The smell made my eyes water.

You never get use to the smell. Out in the open it becomes a tool to know when they are coming but in close quarters it's just like finding a dead body that has been forgotten about for months, in a car, on the hottest day of the year. Bugs won't even feed on these gnarly bastards. I covered my nose and mouth with my shirt. From the noise of us approaching the tied up beast started thrashing and kicking. Black ooze leaked from around her bindings, her skin was torn from thrashing around. Charlie sat down on the floor beside me. We had an easy six feet between us and the thing Charlie called Jasmine.

I pulled my knife from it's holster and looked at Charlie. We both jumped when Elliott slipped under the storage door. Charlie continued into her quiet sobs while Elliott put a hand on my shoulder.

"Jasmine was Charlie's girlfriend. They were on the squad together and our parents just thought she was a close friend. Charlie saved Jazzy in the beginning and we moved here. Their relationship became hard to hide when we were all crammed in the truck for days getting here. Daddy even blamed Jazzy for the deaths of the other girls. Our parents ignored their relationship because obviously there was bigger shit to deal with. Jazzy got bit while we were helping Benny and his family secure these apartments. Charlie and Jazzy wanted to have their own apartment to have more privacy." Elliott made a grimace, "Well, Charlie tied her up when she died before she... came back. I helped her put the body in here. I thought--" Elliot choked by a sob, "I hoped that Jazzy was taken care of."

"I couldn't do it." Charlie sobbed.

I walked over and plunged my blade deep into the skull of the undead cheerleader. The thrashing stopped and her body went limp. I pulled the knife out and blackness oozed everywhere. I spat at the ground to get the smell out of my mouth. I wiped my knife off on the dead girl's pant leg. I calmly walked back over to a hunched-over sobbing Charlie and her sister who was consoling her. I leaned over to be face to face with Charlie and lifted up her face by the chin with my now black ooze splattered hand. She shivered with pain and tears as I told her very solemnly, "That wasn't your Jazzy. This isn't a game. You put everyone at risk. Are you hiding any more dead girlfriends? You have to clean this shit up. Got me?" I kissed her forehead, nodded to her sister and walked out of the storage unit straight to Davis and Lilly who were talking with Krista and Jeremy in the courtyard. I had black splatters on my pants and shirt. As I approached Jeremy and Davis reached for their weapons.

"I would say relax it's me, but I'm pretty sure my news isn't going to be a day at the spa." I said through clinched teeth.

Since it was in the middle of the day we all helped the twins clean up the storage unit and burned the officially dead girlfriend. Charlie won't even look in my direction and Elliott keeps talking for her and apologizing profusely. Buffy and I haven't spoken about our night together. No one in the group has brought it up either. Tonight is my night to keep watch so people think I will be sleeping most of the day. I think it's a good thing.

It's amazing how the end of the world can put things in perspective. Krista is banging all the men in her group. Even Kroger who apparently doesn't speak. They call him Kroger because that's where they found him. Held up in a grocery store he was a night janitor at. Smart hiding place, if you ask me. He kind of speaks through hand jesters and Jeremy swears he's said a few words in the year they've been in the "Zed Wars" together. Jeremy was a teenage drug dealer turned distributor to now zombie killer. Kroger was the first "living being not out to kill anything that moved" (his words) he came across after the dead stopped dying completely. Point is-- no one cares about that extra drama. If anything the group is just happy to be "gettin' some" and now they are happy to be semi-comfortable. They have a whole apartment building now like the Benny's. Both levels of building seven. It was decided last night to integrate them officially. That means putting them on the patrol and the work schedule. We run like a hippy commune. I guess it helps that Benny's family has training in running and feeding large groups.

We are all just happy to be alive and now that all the skeletons are out of the... umm... storage units, we may be able to move forward.

New Comers

A bullet whizzed through the apartment and embedded its self in the wall in the hallway.

What. The. Fuck.

I'm so lucky that I was doing my crunches in the living room when it happened. I heard the pop and only knew where it ended up when the picture in hallway hit the floor. Glass everywhere. Up until that point I didn't even realize there was a picture in the hall. I crawled over to the picture, a loving couple and a baby. A family photo. I grabbed my weapons and left the apartment. I went around the corner of the building and could hear the yelling on the far side of the complex, near the 301. Shit.

I noticed the twins crouched behind a building on the inside of the courtyard. I join them and ask what's going on.

"New comer. Benny saw them and the dude shot at him. Lucky for Benny the dude is a shitty shot." Elliott said with big eyes.

"Yeah, well, it could've been me. The bullet is in the wall of the hallway." I replied.

We turned to listen more as Davis went to the gate. Luckily the new guy hadn't breached the gate. The men were discussing what the protocol of the new guy crossing the gate should be. I gripped my knife and cleared my throat. I got this.

I came across the parking lot and cuffed the knife against my arm. I approached the men and took note of the packed truck in the road behind the guy. I saw movement. He's not alone. I tab the shoulders of Benny and Davis to stop the arguing. I pull them a couple feet back after giving the "One moment." motion with my hand to the guy on the other side of the gate. We move far enough away from the guy so he can't hear us whisper.

"Look, we're mind fucking him right now. He shot at you and he is obviously looking for some form of comfort. We all have locks on our doors and we have walkies between us in case shit hits the fan with this guy. I say we let him in--"

Davis cuts me off, "But what if he jumps us as soon as we let him in?"

"Look-- that gun shot let some shamblers know we are here. Either we let him in and set him up at least temporarily or risk him trying to set up somewhere else and leading the fuckers even close to us, but en masse." I made sure to make eye contact with both men to gauge their reactions. They weren't opposed. "First, we assess their group and make them strip. We have to make sure they aren't bit. They should at least appreciate that. Once they are okay we make them leave the vehicle on the outside and allow them within the gate. What house would be better for everyone, Davis?" It's strange how they just let me take control. It must be my time on the outside.

"Uhhh, probably building seven. It's on the corner in between us all. Benny can see them from his place and you're on the backside so if they are trying to do anything funny out of sight you are more likely to catch it." Davis said, gripping his shovel.

"Hey, fellas. I don't like being so out in the open here. We deciding something?" The guy called, carefully, while glancing around.

"Right. We don't tell them where we are held up. Tonight we eat picnic style outside the pool gate at the tables there. We escort them to their apartment, ground level. Keep a copy of the keys. You guys watched me so I trust we can watch them the same. Integration starts once we gain that trust." I nodded to the guy, "You see anything?"

He shook his head no, "Sorry I shot at you, dude. You gotta understand why I'm jumpy."

"Davis, go get the keys to seven. Benny, come with me." Benny and I approached the guy on the outside of the gate. When we got up to him he seemed a lot calmer than before I joined the discussion. "Okay, this is how it's going to go. You're going to get everyone you have with you out and by the gate. Strip to your skivvies and once you're cleared you guys can come in here. We have plenty of space. No more than one melee weapon per person. Leave your firearms in your vehicle until we're sure you aren't here to take us over.  We won't bother them. You can park outside the gate to where you can keep watch to make sure. There is safety in numbers. We don't fuck with you, you don't fuck with us. Got it?"

The guy seemed visibly annoyed but willing. "Sure. Where do I need to park?" I motioned to the 'Exit Only' gate. It was the only gate they hadn't completely blocked off with a car. It was a gate we could unlatch a few chains to let people semi-comfortably squeeze through the opening and we could easily re-secure it. Easy, but time consuming.

When it was just me, I had jumped the fence and broke into my apartment through an unlocked window. I knew the chances of finding an unlocked window was better on a second level.

The guy re-parked outside the gate and showed up with with five others. He had been driving a diesel full sized truck so that many people wasn't so far fetched. Four men and two women, counting him. They each had large bags with them. Nothing too big though, everyone traveled very similar these days. Even the Benny's each had a duffel they would grab to go if need be. Without a word they all undressed, Benny and I had our quiet distance weapons at the ready in protective stance. The guy was so nervous I promised we'd watch their backs since they promised to do our song and dance to get in here. The sun was starting it's slow slink behind the horizon. I wanted them inside before true dusk. The group as a whole looked very underfed. Their lips parched with dehydration. No wonder the guy seemed so desperate for us to help. I could hear the twins, their mom and Randi setting up dinner in the courtyard. We all wanted to be in our homes before the curfew we had set up for each other. Even though we have been broken, now that there are new people our unit has become one again. Us against them. Maybe this is what we all needed. Fresh blood.

Davis rejoined us with keys and started un-threading the chains. The first guy undressed and passed inspection first. Davis checked their bags on the way in to make sure they weren't carrying. The whole process took maybe fifteen minutes but felt like hours. They grouped up behind Benny and I as they shuffled in. Just as the last person crossed the gate we noticed four shamblers coming down the road. Benny and I nodded to each other silently and climbed the car that had been rolled on it's side and jumped the fence. Davis hurriedly re-threaded the chains as Benny and I approached the zombies. We separated and coaxed two a piece in opposite directions.

I had dropped my distance weapon within the gate and was now holding my two go-to melee weapons: a miners shovel strapped to my back and a machete in my hand. Benny had an aluminum baseball bat and his large hunting knife. I had my knife on my thigh strap but that's too close for comfort for me to melee with. I teased my two with the machete and kept my distance. I saw my chance and kicked the kid shambler in the chest, landing him on his back. I then ran circles around the other shambler disorienting it and kicked it over as well. As it lay face down I put a foot in the middle of it's back and brought the machete down taking off the head. I glance up at the kid zombie who had now gotten back to his feet. I glance over to Benny who had also taken down one and was now working on his second. The kid shambler was an easy target. I used the shovel to keep the distance between us and swung my machete around to sever the head.

Benny was wiping off his bat using the shambler's jacket when I came over to him. We shook hands and nodded to each other. We headed back to the gate and used a ladder Davis and the new comers had launched over the side to aide us in getting back over. We climbed the ladder onto the roof of the storage units that line the outside fences and pulled the ladder back up to then get off the roof.

"Let's eat and then we'll show you to your temporary home, eh?" Benny said, propping the ladder on it's side away from the gate.

"You guys have enough food?" One of the women said, putting a hand on her stomach, "For all of us?"

"Yes. We have enough." I said with caution. They don't need to know the wealth of food here just yet.

We got to the rest of the group and they introduced themselves, starting with the dude who came to us first.

Jeremy.
Buffy.
Oliver.
Krista, with a K.
Kroger.
John.

And then there was 18.

Coffee & Voo Doo

I made coffee today. I found coffee filters and these guys were smart enough to have rain barrels for water. Britta pitchers and water purification kits.
I heated the water over warm coals and used the coffee maker to slowly pour the water over the grounds. It is amazing. I'm even drinking it cold. The apartment smelled like coffee. Like home.

Elliott and Charlie are smitten by me. Maybe not romantically but they are loving that someone new, female, and not "old" (their words) is in the group. They came over today when they saw me on the balcony making coffee.
They are twins, both turn twenty this month and talk a lot.

Davis and his family were hardcore about an impending apocalypse. If you ask him, this is China's fault. They found the Benny family here and secured the area. There use to be another family here and the Benny's use to have a few more kids. I guess Avery also isn't their biological child either, but one they adopted after the parent died from the infected.

Elliott and Charlie were in school when the infection hit. Somewhere in Texas. According to Elliott, she got to beat her [infected] teacher with a desk and it was liberating. Charlie rescued a couple girls from her cheerleading squad and managed to get home safely where their parents were waiting for them. Davis had a bug out bag and they had an escape route. They have a boat in Florida. A fancy sail boat that has supplies in it already.

"I doubt its even there anymore." Elliott lamented, staring down into her coffee.
"We ended up staying here because Daddy saw the flaw in a boat escape. It's still our backup plan though for when the shit hits the fan here." Charlie said. She's got quite a bit of sass.

Her cheerleader friends either died trying to find their parents or died while they were scavenging the grocery store. "Dumb bitches." Elliot smirked. Elliott explained how all four cheerleaders had died by 'dumbass mistakes on their part'.

"We burned them in the pool and I have a couple of their skulls. It makes me feel batshit crazy, but I've painted them. Like Day of the Dead. That voo doo stuff, ya know? I even light incense and say a prayer for them. I'd want the same done for me." Charlie said, defending herself.

If this wasn't the apocalypse I would think these girls were severely demented.... With all things considered though, I'd say they are handling it all swimmingly.

They stuck around for my calisthenics and then showed me the apartment gym and a boxing gym they found in one of the storage units that line the complex.
We heard bells and found a zombie tangled in the barbed wire that had been added to the gaps between the gate and the ground. We walked over just in time to see Randi shoot an arrow into the infected's skull.

"Another one bites the dust. Cha-Cha." Sang Charlie as shook her hips with her arms raised above her head. "C'Mon, let's go help her drag that fucker to the pool."

I guess I could get use to living here after all.