Thursday

Yesterday was very difficult for me. A herd came through. Over a thousand, easy.

I was on complete radio silence.

No music. No movement. I literally laid in my floor for 12hrs and tried not to budge, I allowed myself real sleep. My stomach was so upset when I was actually able to move though. They breached the first level but only in the foyer. I have every room in the house sealed off separately in case of an undead break in and everything is bleached down there to make sure my scent is long gone. There were so many of them I really think it was being forced on the sidelines and being attracted by the reflection from the light posts. I have removed them completely, only cords hang there now. I made sure to rip them off the wall so it looked like the undead did it by a casual observation.

I have to make this house look boarded up and abandoned. My life depends on it. Anyone who wants to kill for a new place to live will look for an occupied house. Where people are there is food. Where people are there is sustainability. They want to take that from you. Don't ever doubt that. I observe people before allowing them into the house for any length of time. I also don't use a conventional entrance to the house so I have to make sure they are able. No one sickly is allowed... no discussion. Any sign of being sick is a death sentence. I've seen people arguing in the street and either left for the zombies to consume them or shot in the face. Some of them I'm pretty sure just had a generic head-cold. There were reports before the news system were dismantled about people killing their whole families because they felt they couldn't protect them.

I'm not one of those cases. If someone seems sick I don't even let them know I exist. I have boarded up the homes on either side of me to look very similar to mine. They are all very large houses. Large houses in the midst of this nastiness is a death sentence. No one wants to stay a night in a big house that might get attacked in the middle of the night with no way to make 100% sure they have checked every window and door... big houses early on were broadcasted as deathtraps rather than sanctuaries. There are still radio broadcasts streaming on repeat telling people to stay away from large houses and large buildings. It helps in my favor. People usually camp out in one of the houses across the street, it's rather tiny. I leave canned foods over there because I'd rather these nomads feel they have lucked out and not go searching through the community to scavenge. I leave enough there to support 4 people for a week. Enough that people don't go looking for more. I have guns but I don't use them. I carry a .375 S&W Magnum strapped to my leg and I always have a blade with me. Two sizes, a small switch blade I have in my pocket and a large I keep on my belt in a holster. I only carry my machete when I'm doing my rounds or clean up. Blades don't run out of ammo or cause too much noise. I only have a gun for people who aren't dead yet.

I have a few other guns but I carry the most light weight and one I can easily reload. Also, I have a makeshift carrying case so it doesn't look like I'm carrying a gun. I can reach down and grab it without anyone suspecting a thing. I found it in one of my neighbors houses. I guess they got killed while away and never had the chance to take it with them. Guns were a must have in the evacuation process. When it got really nasty the government issued a statement telling all militias to gather and to protect their neighborhoods. None of them survived... to my knowledge. They were sitting ducks, drunken rednecks drinking beer shooting up a storm just attracting more and more undead to replace their wasted bullets.


As I laid there on the floor yesterday I stared at the ceiling and counted the cracks, too scary to look outside. Any flutter of curtains or sign of life and I would've had a swarm on me. I'm not even how long ago they moved on. Usually if a house is breached and the zombie stumble out later, un-phased or un-smelling of a victim the mass keeps moving. I had no fan going so I was nervous about my sweating. I have no idea how well their senses are but I know that when I go out on a cooler day and I don't sweat as much I don't have as much problems as days I'm sweating through my clothes. I woke up to the noise under me when I was breached but I was confident in my safe hold. I have long-ago ripped up the staircase for firewood and extra protection. If there are no means to travel upon, there are no means to get me. They would fall into the basement and that just makes clean up all the easier. They also didn't actually get into the house, just tore down a layer of the barricade and got bored with it when they didn't sense anyone in the house. I had fallen asleep on the floor and wasn't moving. I use to be such an active sleeper and now I sleep like a corpse. The less noise I make the more likely I am to see tomorrow.

Tuesday.2

Today was rough. I'm so glad it's dark out. Today was really rough. I mean... yeah... I can't even put it into words... so I won't bother.

I didn't leave the house... not once. I'm so glad that the power still works but it's been so hot and the large ac unit outside is too loud to run. It attracts too many. I run a fan and crack a window but if they smell... or sense... or whatever they do... sweat... if they smell (just for sake of argument) your sweat they go all crazy.

I'm so lucky that they are the slow shambling idiots they are but I don't like to have more than a hundred at a time on my street. Sometimes I'm lucky and they migrate together and I can go gather supplies from neighboring houses or the grocery store on the corner. Them all being gone for any length of time is rare and only happens in what feels like an eternity between the breaks. The moans are unsettling and they are just as unhappy with the heat as I am... but it seems to expedite the rotting process. (I don't want to talk about the smell... I've puked enough in one life time) They seem slightly more sluggish but that's only because the sun is so hot it's boiling them. I can see from my bedroom window their skin bubbling and their lips chapping. Their tongues hang out like a dog.... I really think they'd pant if they used their lungs.

I am typing this by candle light, huddled in a corner. They see anything shiny or "different" against a horizon they attack it. They lunge for it. They go for hours and hours until they can consume it. When I go out I have to shoot a house across the street (in the opposite direction I want to go to) with a flare gun. I hit the same damn house every time... and they never learn it's a trick, lucky me. I board up the windows more securely at night with large bolts. Nailing at this time of night would be suicide. I can't see them and with low visibility they have the upper hand. They don't have to see you, they just have to have the idea in their heads that you're in front of them... they don't need eyes.... they just go. They go until you are consumed.

I better sleep. I raise when the sun does. Although I don't really sleep. I don't sleep with any noise but the moans and the moans are not a sweet lullaby to hum mindlessly during happy times. I listen. I listen and get brief naps until the sun rises. I have to be on alert at all hours of the day. During the middle of the day I nap some too. I take two hour "lay downs" every six hours. I have to stay rested. Without rest one goes crazy (or crazier) and without rest one gets weak. One cannot get weak. One does push ups constantly. One is me. I am one. I am the only one.

Okay, not the only one... there are people who pass by... but never groups bigger than 3, and rarely are they ever related or family before all this. We are all family after this, but we can only choose that family now. I choose to be one. One is a safe number. One will not fuck one over.... one will never hold a gun to ones head.

Got it?

Tuesday

It has been roughly a year since the apocalypse hit. How do I still have power? Well, my guess is whoever was meant to shut it off died like the rest of them. I have documented my past days on paper but have found out that I have a resource I have overlooked for so long... the internet. Could someone possibly read this? Is there still help? I'm not sure. I am at a location I will only give vague details about... I have learned the hard way. When I first hunkered down I wanted to find as many other survivors as possible... I wanted to help as many as possible. That led to disaster and now I only give refuge to people who are only passing through and do not wish to stay for more than a week. If they don't want to leave? I make them.

This house had 6 people living in it "before" but now... now it's just me... in this large six bedroom house. I have it more protected than you could ever imagine. Months of solitude can perfect any obsession, my OCD thrives in this environment.

I have told you nothing because I feel no one would read this anyway. I don't know why I'm even trying this... the world is dead. I know that now. Dead. Gone... and shambling down my road like I owe them something. Them. It, they are nothing now. Just rotting corpses and a lapse of reason. Many of them died because they are stupid and did not heed the warnings. Even the CDC released a statement about what to do when zombies attacked, the fucking idiots... those shambling idiots outside just thought it was a cute joke... a mockery of how to get information to the public.

Such fools.